CHAPTER XXII - WINE AND THE MAN

The unfortunate collapse of Vedrona at such a critical moment produced a scene of superstitious consternation among the guests, and nothing but the resourceful coolness of Lais prevented a regrettable termination of the banquet. She, however, who prided herself in being equal to any emergency, was not likely to be disconcerted when the anticipated occurred, and with ingenious tact speedily put an end to the excitement by the announcement that the Princess was so far prepared for what had taken place that she had specially requested that if her withdrawal, owing to exhaustion, should be necessary, the same should in no way interfere with the progress of the revels.

Teresh and Zachra exchanged a meaning and doubtful look, but at the moment Machaon returned with the assurance that there was no cause for anxiety, and the incident was mostly forgotten in favour of the entertainment.

In her arrangements for the banquet Lais had been careful to allocate to Casca a cup-bearer in whom she had special confidence, with instructions to encourage the eunuch in his cups, until it should be necessary to carry him from the table to sleep off the effects of the wine. But the indisposition of Vedrona had an undesirably restraining action, and Casca, refusing further drink, left the table more garrulous than incompetent, and Lais presently received the news of him being the talkative centre of a company of friends she was not particularly anxious for him to meet in his present communicative mood. She therefore sent a messenger to command his immediate presence.

When the slave arrived Casca was fast falling a victim to flattery, on the part of several who were desirous of knowing what had brought about the retirement of the Princess. “It's a capital story, and well worth listening to,” he was saying. “Eh! What?” he enquired from the importunate slave at his elbow. “Ah! just as I expected. As I say, it's one of the funniest stories you ever heard. But you will have to wait for it. Lais wants me - can't get on without me! Only understands generalities - all the details are mine. But I'll come back, and I'll make Zachra's hair walk over his head.”

“We want to hear it now - tell us before you go,” half a dozen pleaded. “Do you? Well, then there's no reason - “ A second slave interrupted him. “The Princess Lais commands my lord's immediate presence.”

“D -- n the Princess!” he replied. “Does it take two of your cursed black brood to tell me that; or, does she think I am a slave?”

“Well spoken, Casca! Assert your independence!” his friends encouraged.

“Independence, indeed! I'll let her know that I am in possession of secrets that would make her my slave, if I cared to speak. I am neither slave nor servant to any woman.”

“Well said, Casca; but tell us this story.”

“I should think it was well said, and you would think so if you knew what I could tell you, had I the mind to do so. Why, gentlemen, before this very night is over - “

“The Princess awaits you instantly!” This time the messenger was one of the minor officials.

“What do you think of that for importance, eh! Look here - only three of 'em after me before I have time to count whether I have as many fingers on my right hand as on my left. Then some people have the idea that Velia could go on without Casca. Hallo! here comes another.”

“My lord Casca, the Princess requires your immediate attendance.”

“Does she! She's a good woman, but a little too impetuous. I must keep her waiting, then she will know how to appreciate me. Don't you wish you were so necessary gentlemen? Don't you wish you had such a mind and genius? But I want to tell you this story before I go, and I'll do it just to show you that I can be king of the castle at any time I make up my mind to be so.”

At this moment one of the officers of the guard entered the room, and addressing Casca, said “The Princess Lais commands me to bring you at once into her presence.”

“Well, well! I say, friends, do you hear that? Now this is carrying a joke too far! Did she, seriously, tell you to arrest me, Casca! the Queen's Chamberlain? By the gods, I'll let her know who I am. Gentlemen, I must ask your pardon for a little while. I'll not forget the story; but damme, I must let this woman know I won't stand any insolence.”

“The fates all work against us,” said Teresh, as the muddled chamberlain strutted off in company with the officer.

“It is generally said that the gods take care of their own,” replied Zachra, “but I'll be hanged if I think they do their work half as well as the furies. Do as we will we cannot get anything stronger than a suspicion to work

“I though we were certainly safe to hear something when he was so mellowed down,” said another.

“So we should, if we could have kept him quiet. He has just had enough to unloose his tongue, and would have told us everything.”

“We must keep our eye on him when he leaves Lais,” suggested Zachra.

“She will not let him go again so easily, my friend,” said Teresh. “All these hurried messengers tell me how anxious she is about his tongue. We shall not see Casca again tonight.”

Meanwhile the officer had conducted the loquacious eunuch to the apartment where the restless Lais awaited him “Now comes the crowning moment of our long sought victory,” grandiloquently exclaimed Casca, as he met the royal lady.

“Don't be a fool,” she returned, indignantly. “A what?”

“A fool. I sent for you because I need some little advice; but look at your condition! I wanted a man - and I get a wine skin; a counsellor, and I find an idiot!”

“My dear lady, let me assure you that you never made such an unjust mistake before. I know the importance of to-night, and have taken the precaution just to make myself the equal of twenty men; but as for drinking - well, I have not had half enough to quench my first thirst.”

The loquacious bombast of the man was not a little irritating to Lais, especially as it suggested the probability of his having already said too much; but this was one of the risks she was compelled to run by association with him. Yet he was the only available puppet at her disposal. Without him, dangerous as he was, her cause would have been an impossible one, and she had taken every precaution to prevent his knowledge of her plans being either consistent or clear. He certainly knew she was doing something, but beyond that his ideas of her scheme were not even distantly related to her own. Still, she had to bear with him and keep his tongue silent until her coup was made, whatever might be the result. What he had already said under the influence of liquor she must be prepared to deal with; but she had the consolation of knowing he was henceforth safe, so could afford to humour him, while she went about her business.

“Well, perhaps I have done you a certain amount of injustice, but I am worried - anxious, and you must forgive me. But you are equally unjust to me when you consider it necessary to tell me that you are worth twenty other men, as if I have not the discernment to discover that for myself. I don't generally associate myself with fools! Still we will say no more about it! We have to work now, and while I put matters in train for our final move I want you to remain here, where I can find you at any instant, in case I need your assistance.”

“I will be back before you can turn round twice, Lais; but I must have one other cup of wine.”

“You may have six if you choose, but must not go away. I will send you a special skin of such wine you have rarely tasted.”

“But I have left some friends who - “

“Are they of more importance to you than Vedrona is?” “Ah! Now that is something like talking. How soon shall she be mine?”

“To-morrow, without fail.”

“But that won't do, Lais; won't do at all. You said it should be to-night, and I shall hold you to your engagement.”

“But don't you know that she has gone home?”

“That has nothing to do with it. I insist on you keeping your promise.”

“So I can to-morrow, easily. I shall capture Glarces to-night, and then you can have Vedrona to-morrow, as a pleasant settlement of the difficulty.”

“Won't do, my dear lady - won't do. I am not half so good at waiting as you are, and it must be the other way about.”

“Well, if you insist, I suppose it must be so; but I always regarded you as a man careful of ordinary courtesy to a lady.”

“Certainly so - certainly so! That is in a general sense; but love and matrimony are always selfish, Lais. They care nothing about courtesies.”

“Have your own way.I will send your wine, then see how I can serve your purpose, and will return almost immediately.”

She was gone before he had time to reply, and almost at the instant a slave entered with the wine.

Men in the peculiarly half-and-half condition which Casca occupied just then are not always so easily deluded as may be imagined. Up to a certain point liquor occasionally stimulates a development of craft and cunning, in the individual, otherwise unsuspected. It was so with the chamberlain. The almost simultaneous entrance of the slave with the exit of Lais aroused a certain suspicion in his mind, and with that a determination not to touch the drink but secure a retreat. The clumsy anxiety of the disingenuous menial strengthened this conclusion, until Casca saw that he was practically regarded as a prisoner. He did not protest nor claim his freedom, but with a specious craft, not possible to him in his sober moments, he presently outwitted his gaoler and found his way into the fernery, open air, and, as a natural consequence, complete intoxication.

Glarces had but a moment before bade his sister and Tasha “good-night;” then, taking a seat, was reviewing the incidents of the day and night, as also considering the effects produced upon himself by that first cup of old wine.

It was a strange and novel experience, and its influence would have been far greater than it was, had it so far changed the man as to make him forget to analyse and study the lessons to be derived therefrom. He was not slow to recognise the witchery of its exhilaration; under the pleasant buoyancy of spirits it encouraged, he had almost entirely lost the sense of fatigue, and was free to admit the overpowering temptation of just one other cup to make him completely happy. But he equally recognised the danger and the debasing cowardice of the sophistry. Prudence and loyalty had compelled him to drink that one cup, which he did not regret, but to drink again would be both untrue to himself, and ignoble, and Glarces could never be that.

Just then the thick guttural utterances of Casca broke upon his ear. He divined the situation in an instant, and the unwonted geniality of his own spirits at once suggested his studying the eunuch under the new aspect now presented.

The air and wine between them were fast reducing the chamberlain to a condition of helplessness, so Glarces went to his assistance.

“Well now,” chuckled Casca, in drunken enjoyment of what he considered to be a capital joke, “only to think of finding you here, and all alone too. Are you alone, Glarces?”

“Of course I am alone - and why not?” asked the Prince, assisting the uncertain chamberlain to a seat beside him. “Glarces, m'boy, lis'n to me an' doan make y'self ridic'lous. I ask you why you're here, then you ask me ‘why not.’ Now is that an intellgen' answer to my question?” “It is the most appropriate I can find at the moment.” “Then you're drunk, Glarces, an' I'm sorry for it. Some people are more fortunate than I am. I've been looking for wine all night, and can't find 'nough to wash the dust off my tongue.”

“Is that due to the lack of wine, or the quantity of dust, my friend?”

“Ah! Good-good! That reminds me what it was I wanted to see you for. Now, Glarces, answer me as one man ought to answer another. Am I your friend or am I not?” “Surely it is too late for us to argue a question like that.”

“Now, now; do be reasonable and sens'ble. This is the one quest'n that's never too late or out of place. Ask it oft'n, and don't let it be 'vaded. Am I your friend or am I not?”

“I hope you are.”

“Can't y' say yes or no? Well, never mind; p'raps y'can't, an' I don't want to be hard on you. Now lis'n to me. I'm older than you are, an' know things that would astonish you; so I want to give you a bit of advice.”

“I shall be glad to hear it,” replied the Prince, wondering what further revelations the philosopher of wine was about to disclose.

“Now, every wise man wants to do the best for himself, doesn't he?” “Certainly.”

“The great quest'n is, how to do it.”

“And what do you suggest?”

“There is but one way - that's my way.”

“But what is it ?”

“Now, Glarces, do try to be patient, an' allow me a chance of speaking. 'Scuse me, but you don't happen to have a cup of wine handy, do you?”

“No!”

“Y'see it's hard to keep the sacred fire burning W’out oil. But I never grumble, Glarces, I never grumble.”

“But what about your method of success?”

“I'm getting to it, m'friend; I'm getting to it all the time, if y'wont interfere, an' int'rupt me. Now just look at the fairy snakes on them leaves in the moonlight, arn't they beau'ful?”

“I don't see them.”

“No, of course not. That's the penalty you have to pay for gettin' drunk. Don't never do it again, Glarces.” “Very well. But what about - “

“Lis'n to me! Now - what was I going to say?”

“You were about to tell me how to succeed in life.”

“I know all about it. But why won't you be quiet, and let me go on? Now, as I tell you, there are as many ways of doing it as there are days in the year, but there's only one right way.”

“And that is - “

“My way, of course; and that is by ‘the give and take’ process. Do y'understand?”

“Not quite clearly.”

“M'friend, I'm very much 'fraid you're too drunk to know what I'm telling you; and I'm grieved at it, Glarces - always sorry to see a man in your pos'tion forget himself. He looks such a fool.”

“So am I sorry, but go on, I will do my best to understand you.”

“That's bet'r. Now, if y'll only keep like that, p'raps I can do something with you. Let me see, what was we talkin' 'bout?”

“Your method of success.”

“Yes, that's right! I wanted to know if y'was conscious of what I was tellin' you. Now, what did I tell y'it was?”

“Give and take.”

“Yes, but what is give and take?” “You did not explain.”

“Ah! y' getting bet'r; but if y' int'rupt me again I shall have to get a drink, I c'n hardly speak now.”

“I will not do so.”

“Now, let me 'splain. In give an' take you don't really give anything - an' yet you do; but you give it to take it back again, an' something else beside. Do you see what I mean?”

“Not quite, at present; but go on, I shall understand as you proceed.” “'Scuse me, Glarces, but you're a fool. That's what Lais said.” “Lais told you that I am a fool?”

“No! She said I was a fool, an' I say you are - so, of course, you are.”

“Not of necessity, my friend,” replied the Prince, somewhat relieved to find there was no more behind the remark. “According to my process of reasoning a fool's fool would be a wise man.”

“So I am, but then y'see y're drunk, and y're reasoning is all wrong. That's why I w'nt to advise y' for y'r own good.”

“And I am waiting to hear what you have to say.”

“Well then, lis'n to me. Look at what I am, an' what I was. D' you want to be that?”

“What you were! Certainly not.”

“That's what I didn't say But see! I hold the confidence of the greatest livin' Prince, and by my shrewdness have come to be abs'lutely necess'ry to his well being. D' y' w'nt to be that?”

Certainly the wine was speaking rather than the man. Under its traitorous influence, and relying upon the traditional liberties of the day, Casca was unreservedly revealing his true character to his own undoing. All that Glarces had previously heard - and more - was being confirmed. The man he had placed such confidence in - for whose friendship he had in a measure slighted the well-tried counsel of Teresh - was at length witnessing against himself, and confirming more than others had yet laid to his charge.

The unintentional confession was serious, but none the less important. It was an opportunity which might not occur again readily, and since it had come unsought, Glarces received it as a guiding indication of the gods, that the time had arrived to know and truly understand the man. With this impression he continued to encourage the conversation. “I scarcely understand what you mean.”

“L'k 'ere, Glarces, would y' like t' have the best m'n on earth under y'r own thumb?”

“It would give me a certain amount of power, wouldn't it?”

“Power, m' boy; it makes y' a king - more! it makes y' almost a god. Great as the m'n is you are fooling' yr greater, because y' do fool him - see!”

“But you put is so vaguely before.” “No, Gl'ces! It's you that's drunk.” “Go on; I understand you now.”

“Yes! It's passin' off a bit.”

“Well, to return to your question - yes, I should like to be as you say.” “Then you must learn to ‘give an' take’”

“May I not give without taking?”

“No, y' can't. It's imposs'ble - b'yond y'r power - outside human nature! Lis'n! The world's just like a woman if y' want to get on with either you mus' let them do as they like wi' you. One time they will run af'r you - call y' a hero, and pet you to death - that's when they want something When a wom'n's got it she runs away - that's just to see if y' think enough about her to follow her. So she says; but it's really to see if she's gone too far with the liberty she's taken. Do you un'erstan' me now?”

“Go on, I am listening.”

“Well, that's what I mean by ‘give an' take.’ You have to humour the woman, and let her think she does as she likes wi' you - ”

“So she does.”

“N't at all, m' dear fellow, n't at all.”

“But she gets what she wants before she runs away.”

“Right. Y'r gettin' bet'r now, so we'll proceed. She gets what she wants, but that's only for the moment. You're going to take it back again, with all you wanted at first as int'rest. You've only been foolin' her.”

“Is that quite manly, Casca?” queried the Prince anxious not to miss the opportunity of sounding the depth of the speaker's morality.

“Manly!” he reiterated with vehement indignation. “There's nothing manly about a woman - they don't like it - can't un'erstand it. They were made to be fooled, an, they expect it - can't be happy w'out it. A moth is never happy till its wings are singed by the lamp, an' woman are only moths! They are on'y happy when in mischief, an' trying to injure themselves. You've got to humour an' amuse them, Glarces, or life will be a burden to them.”

“But life ought to be more than amusement,” he answered

“Of course it is, but that's the other side of the quest'n, to which I was just coming. When you've got all you want from the world - an' the women as well, for I always mean the woman, whether I say so or not - then you grow serious, an' make them un'erstand that no more f'miliarity is permissible for the pr'sent. In other words, when we've got all we want - far more than ev'r they had from us - we run away, and mustn't be spoken to n'r looked at unt'l we want the woman again. But b'lieve, Glarces-an' lis'n-for I'm going to tell you a secret you'll find to be quite true. Life's all play and make b'lieve! B'tween you an' me, the gods don't yet know how to make an honest man; an' him in whom you place most conf'dence is gen'rally the worst hyp'crite of the lot. Now, let m'see - what was I saying? Oh! I know - I was coming to the wom’n. Now, to help us lay aside our dignity, and b'come f'miliar, without inconsistency, the gods have arranged these festivals, when we can be our real selves, and meet the world on equal terms.”

“And the women,” suggested the Prince, wondering whether there was anything more to be said in this connection. “Oh! of course; always the women, b'cause the world would be unbearable w'out them. Now you see how I unbend on these 'casions. You haven't known me like this b'fore, have you?”

“No, that I have not. I wish I had.”

“So d' I. But then, y' see, y'd never come to the festival. Now y're here y' must follow my example, and let me show you the c'rect thing t' do.”

“In what way?”

“In ev'ry way. Now lis'n: first. I always give the Queen's Chamberlain a hol'day on these 'casions; y'see he's too ceremonious. Has to be - can't help it - it's his duty. But ceremony's out of place here - won't do at all, so I let him go to begin with. Next, I have to put Casca out of the way. He's too d- - - d proud and supercil'ous to speak to a women - thinks they're like slaves, only good'nough to put his feet on - “

“But Casca would not put his feet on slaves.”

“You don't know him, m' friend; he's too deep to let you, but at home he always sits with a slave un'er his feet.” This was another confirmation of an old rumour. “Well, you get rid of Casca.”

“Yes, an' then y' see, I can just be my own free an' easy self. Oh, an' pardon me, Glarces, but I quite forgot to intr'duce m'self b'fore. Now, I want you to let the Prince and Glarces go to the dev'l for t'night, and come wi' me an' be a man among men.”

“And women. Don't forget them.”

“Cer'nly not, y' poor in'cent; y'might as well think I should forget the wine as the women.”

“I am afraid I shall have to ask you to excuse me, though I have no doubt you would show me many surprising things; but I am not quite so free as you are, and must give Lais some little assistance.”

“Well, there you are, I've told you what to do, now you can practice on Lais. But, I say, Glarces, don't forget you owe a special duty to Vedrona to­night, the sweetest, best an' most lov'ble women - “

“Stop, Casca; please omit my sister's name from your drunken ravings.”

“Well, now - come, Glarces, you will go too far for me in a minute. P'raps I had bet'r tell you what Lais is going to do for me to-night.”