CHAPTER IX

SUPER-NORMAL SENSE-IMPRESSIONS, ETC.

IT may have been observed that in some of the accounts given, sense-impressions experienced by me have played some part in intensifying the feeling of reality conveyed to my mind.

It would appear that anyone possessed of mediumistic powers (usually described as a sensitive) becomes aware from time to time of the operating of an expanded consciousness; clairvoyance and clairaudience fall naturally into this category, and it seems probable that there are other varieties of manifestation.

My own experience includes many of these, and I record them simply as they came to me, without any attempt at classification or explanation. I cannot attempt either, as my experience has been too limited; no doubt this could be undertaken by other sensitives, who possess a longer record of such impressions from which to make deductions.

I have, from time to time throughout my life, been conscious of supernormal impressions, if I may roughly classify the following as such. My first memory of this kind is of a dream when I was five years old; I was seriously ill at the time, and it seemed to me that I had left my body, and was moving through space, guided by someone, who took me to heaven, into the Presence of Christ.

He was seated on a throne, around which many people were standing. I was not immediately presented to Him, but when my turn came I was told to go forward, and Christ placed a little crown on my head, very gently and kindly. On my way back, I passed hell, which looked like a hole in the ground, from which clouds of smoke came up; I saw many people going down there, and was greatly distressed about this when I awoke. The strongest impression which remained with me was that of the personality of Christ, and I lay still for a long time, lest the feeling should leave me.

I have remembered this dream clearly all my life, and the room in which it took place.

The next experience 'that I can remember came to me when I was helping to train students for teaching at a certain College; 'the work was very engrossing, and I fully expected that this would be my occupation for the future.

On two occasions, however, I heard a voice clairaudiently which told me that I should not be at the College long, and that my life-work did not lie there. As a matter of fact, I was at the College for a year.

In the early morning of New Year's Day (I think in 1910) I saw at about 7 a.m. a large wooden cross in my room. It appeared as if made of dark oak, and was very large, reaching almost to the ceiling; it remained stationary for a few seconds, and then vanished. An impression of coming difficulties was left strongly in my mind, and one of the most formidable faced me about a fortnight later, and others throughout that year.

In December, 1916, I woke one night to see a bright figure bending over me, but the face was not discernible; another night I woke suddenly, and found myself enveloped in a flood of light. I have continually seen rays of light apparently issuing from my own head, and assume that this must be the "aura" often described by clairvoyants.

In February of the same year, on the 11th and 15th, I saw on each occasion a shadowy white figure, unrecognisable but clear.

On July 1st and 12th, 1917, I had two psychic experiences, which may or may not have been connected; I have never been able to find out if they had any meaning.

On the 1st, I woke at 2 a.m., and saw a man with a white drawn face, and eyes dilated and wild. He conveyed the impression to me of saying "I will do it" (meaning suicide). When he had vanished, I was left with a great feeling of fear.

On the 12th, at 3:30 a.m., I was awakened by the report, heard clairaudiently, of a pistol shot, and caught a glimpse of someone holding a pistol to the back of his head. I had an oppressive feeling of being in close proximity to this person at the moment.

Twice I have experienced strongly, and often slightly, the feeling of being drawn out of my body to watch some passing event; this usually occurs just before sleep.

On the first occasion the darkness of my room appeared to focus, into a ball I of blackness, which suddenly opened, and disclosed a wide, straight road, along which a motor-car was rushing at great speed. I seemed 'to follow this car, keeping close behind it, and had the impression afterwards that I had saved it from an accident, or that I myself had had a narrow escape.

I was suddenly back on my bed, gasping for breath, my heart beating very quickly, fully awake.

On the second occasion, at 2:15 p.m., I was resting on my bed, when I found myself following a motor-ambulance in the same way; we rushed past two cars coming towards us; the road we were on. was wide, and very dusty, raised above the surrounding fields. The day was bright, and the contrasting darkness of two tunnels under which we passed was very marked.

On November 21st, 1917, and April 12th, 1918, I saw two people clairvoyantly, neither of whom had been known to me in earth-life; I identified them by describing them afterwards.

One was an elderly lady, whose daughter was staying with me at the time; the other was the sister of a friend with whom I was staying.

Referring to the latter, the son of the lady who had died was expected home on leave from the East that day, and the appearance of his mother seemed to be in some way connected with his expected arrival.

In January, 1918, I saw some writing on the wall of my room; it consisted of two Christian names and a surname, all of which I recognised, as they were the names of an airman whom I knew to have been killed, though he was not personally known to me. I also had the impression that I was trying to write automatically. A few days later a friend, to whom I had not mentioned this incident, chanced to. remark that on the 28th she had received a short message automatically written, from this airman.

On February 2nd, 1918, I had a curiously vivid dream, which at the time seemed to be more like a vision.

I was walking along a corridor in an old house, guided by an elderly lady, with very beautiful soft white hair. I noticed some fine stained glass windows on the right side of the corridor, and we stopped once while she remarked on these.

At the end of the corridor was a door on the left, and a maid passed us, and opened this door; I glanced in, and saw the maid proceeding to lay the fire. The room was dimly lighted, as the curtains, blue in colour, were not drawn back; the colouring of the room was indistinctly blue throughout. There was an old lady lying in bed, facing the window, and the one who was guiding me told me that this was her sister, who was ill.

I have a dim recollection' of such a house, but the clue is too slight to pursue.

I have three times seen (clairvoyantly) the friend who has assisted me with this book once when she was away on rather distressing business, once when I myself woke in the night with a feeling of distress, and the third time for no reason that we can remember.

During the Spring of 1918, a stranger engaged in war-work slept at our house for several months, and after she had left, I happened to sleep for one night in the room that she had occupied. I woke several times in the night, feeling very uneasy, and conscious of someone standing close to the bed, He leaned over me, and on. his face was a very fixed, searching expression, and hard lines round the mouth. I shrank from the feeling of distress that he brought with him each time that he came near me.

It occurred to me the second time that he was seeking someone, not myself, whom he expected to find there; I therefore mentally explained to him that Miss X- had left, and he disappeared. A few, days later, I met Miss X-, and she told me that a brother of hers was just reported "Missing."

So far as I know, no news of him has been received.

On August 14th, 1918, at about 10 p.m.,

I had a strong presentiment that some tragedy had taken place, either that someone had died suddenly or been killed in the war; I mentioned this at the time to my friend. This ominous feeling remained with me for quite an hour, accompanied by great physical discomfort; my flesh seemed to "creep," and I shivered. I also became aware that someone was in my. room, trying to attract my attention, but I could see nothing, and had no idea who it could be.

Two days later a telegram came to my friend, asking her to break the news of a sudden death to someone staying in her house.

Some years ago I attended the funeral of an old clergyman whom I had visited constantly during his last illness.

The service was taken by his eldest son, who was also a clergyman. There was a long pause for silent prayer before the coffin was removed from the Church, and glancing up during this silence, I saw that the officiating priest was standing before the altar, with his arms raised high above his head. He remained in this position for a curiously long time, and the congregation grew a little restless at the delay.

I do not know whether anyone else became aware, as I did, of the cause of this delay.

I could see quite plainly the outstretched arms and hands of his father, reaching down from above, and grasping his own; I knew the hands too well to mistake them.

The son did not change his position till the father's grasp was relaxed.

There seemed to be a special significance about this act, as the son had found some difficulty, during his father's later years, in maintaining sympathetic touch with him.

The sense-impressions recorded above, taken as a whole, affect one's normal life very little; I noted them carefully at the time, and put them aside, in case of possible verification later.