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A Wicked Voice.
To M.W., IN REMEMBRANCE OF THE LAST SONG AT PALAZZO BARBARO,
Chi ha inteso, intenda.
THEY have been congratulating me again to-day upon being the only
composer of our days--of these days of deafening orchestral effects and
poetical quackery--who has despised the new-fangled nonsense of Wagner,
and returned boldly to the traditions of Handel and Gluck and the divine
Mozart, to the supremacy of melody and the respect of the human voice.
O cursed human voice, violin of flesh and blood, fashioned with the
subtle tools, the cunning hands, of Satan! O execrable art of singing,
have you not wrought mischief enough in the past, degrading so much noble
genius, corrupting the purity of Mozart, reducing Handel to a writer of
high-class singing-exercises, and defrauding the world of the only
inspiration worthy of Sophocles and Euripides, the poetry of the great
poet Gluck? Is it not enough to have dishonoured a whole century in
idolatry of that wicked and contemptible wretch the singer, without
persecuting an obscure young composer of our days, whose only wealth is
his love of nobility in art, and perhaps some few grains of genius?
And then they compliment me upon the perfection with which I imitate
the style of the great dead masters; or ask me very seriously whether,
even if I could gain over the modern public to this bygone style of music,
I could hope to find singers to perform it. Sometimes, when people talk as
they have been talking to-day, and laugh when I declare myself a follower
of Wagner, I burst into a paroxysm of unintelligible, childish rage, and
exclaim, "We shall see that some day!"
Yes; some day we shall see! For, after all, may I not recover from this
strangest of maladies? It is still possible that the day may come when all
these things shall seem but an incredible nightmare; the day when Ogier
the Dane shall be completed, and men shall know whether I am a follower of
the great master of the Future or the miserable singing-masters of the
Past. I am but half-bewitched, since I am conscious of the spell that
binds me. My old nurse, far off in Norway, used to tell me that
were-wolves are ordinary men and women half their days, and that if,
during that period, they become aware of their horrid transformation they
may find the means to forestall it. May this not be the case with me? My
reason, after all, is free, although my artistic inspiration be enslaved;
and I can despise and loathe the music I am forced to compose, and the
execrable power that forces me.
Nay, is it not because I have studied with the doggedness of hatred
this corrupt and corrupting music of the Past, seeking for every little
peculiarity of style and every biographical trifle merely to display its
vileness, is it not for this presumptuous courage that I have been
overtaken by such mysterious, incredible vengeance?
And meanwhile, my only relief consists in going over and over again in
my mind the tale of my miseries. This time I will write it, writing only
to tear up, to throw the manuscript unread into the fire. And yet, who
knows? As the last charred pages shall crackle and slowly sink into the
red embers, perhaps the spell may be broken, and I may possess once more
my long-lost liberty, my vanished genius.
It was a breathless evening under the full moon, that implacable full
moon beneath which, even more than beneath the dreamy splendour of
noon-tide, Venice seemed to swelter in the midst of the waters, exhaling,
like some great lily, mysterious influences, which make the brain swim and
the heart faint--a moral malaria, distilled, as I thought, from those
languishing melodies, those cooing vocalisations which I had found in the
musty music-books of a century ago. I see that moonlight evening as if it
were present. I see my fellow-lodgers of that little artists'
boarding-house. The table on which they lean after supper is strewn with
bits of bread, with napkins rolled in tapestry rollers, spots of wine here
and there, and at regular intervals chipped pepper-pots, stands of
toothpicks, and heaps of those huge hard peaches which nature imitates
from the marble-shops of Pisa. The whole pension-full is assembled, and
examining stupidly the engraving which the American etcher has just
brought for me, knowing me to be mad about eighteenth century music and
musicians, and having noticed, as he turned over the heaps of penny prints
in the square of San Polo, that the portrait is that of a singer of those
days.
Singer, thing of evil, stupid and wicked slave of the voice, of that
instrument which was not invented by the human intellect, but begotten of
the body, and which, instead of moving the soul, merely stirs up the dregs
of our nature! For what is the voice but the Beast calling, awakening that
other Beast sleeping in the depths of mankind, the Beast which all great
art has ever sought to chain up, as the archangel chains up, in old
pictures, the demon with his woman's face? How could the creature attached
to this voice, its owner and its victim, the singer, the great, the real
singer who once ruled over every heart, be otherwise than wicked and
contemptible? But let me try and get on with my story.
I can see all my fellow-boarders, leaning on the table, contemplating
the print, this effeminate beau, his hair curled into ailes de pigeon, his
sword passed through his embroidered pocket, seated under a triumphal arch
somewhere among the clouds, surrounded by puffy Cupids and crowned with
laurels by a bouncing goddess of fame. I hear again all the insipid
exclamations, the insipid questions about this singer:--"When did he live?
Was he very famous? Are you sure, Magnus, that this is really a portrait,"
&c. &c. And I hear my own voice, as if in the far distance, giving them
all sorts of information, biographical and critical, out of a battered
little volume called The Theatre of Musical Glory; or, Opinions upon the
most Famous Chapel-masters and Virtuosi of this Century, by Father
Prosdocimo Sabatelli, Barnalite, Professor of Eloquence at the College of
Modena, and Member of the Arcadian Academy, under the pastoral name of
Evander Lilyb¾an, Venice, 1785, with the approbation of the Superiors. I
tell them all how this singer, this Balthasar Cesari, was nicknamed
Zaffirino because of a sapphire engraved with cabalistic signs presented
to him one evening by a masked stranger, in whom wise folk recognised that
great cultivator of the human voice, the devil; how much more wonderful
had been this Zaffirino's vocal gifts than those of any singer of ancient
or modern times; how his brief life had been but a series of triumphs,
petted by the greatest kings, sung by the most famous poets, and finally,
adds Father Prosdocimo, "courted (if the grave Muse of history may incline
her ear to the gossip of gallantry) by the most charming nymphs, even of
the very highest quality."
My friends glance once more at the engraving; more insipid remarks are
made; I am requested--especially by the American young ladies--to play or
sing one of this Zaffirino's favourite songs--"For of course you know
them, dear Maestro Magnus, you who have such a passion for all old music.
Do be good, and sit down to the piano." I refuse, rudely enough, rolling
the print in my fingers. How fearfully this cursed heat, these cursed
moonlight nights, must have unstrung me! This Venice would certainly kill
me in the long-run! Why, the sight of this idiotic engraving, the mere
name of that coxcomb of a singer, have made my heart beat and my limbs
turn to water like a love-sick hobbledehoy.
After my gruff refusal, the company begins to disperse; they prepare to
go out, some to have a row on the lagoon, others to saunter before the
cafŽs at St. Mark's; family discussions arise, gruntings of fathers,
murmurs of mothers, peals of laughing from young girls and young men. And
the moon, pouring in by the wide-open windows, turns this old palace
ballroom, nowadays an inn dining-room, into a lagoon, scintillating,
undulating like the other lagoon, the real one, which stretches out yonder
furrowed by invisible gondolas betrayed by the red prow-lights. At last
the whole lot of them are on the move. I shall be able to get some quiet
in my room, and to work a little at my opera of Ogier the Dane. But no!
Conversation revives, and, of all things, about that singer, that
Zaffirino, whose absurd portrait I am crunching in my fingers.
The principal speaker is Count Alvise, an old Venetian with dyed
whiskers, a great check tie fastened with two pins and a chain; a
threadbare patrician who is dying to secure for his lanky son that pretty
American girl, whose mother is intoxicated by all his mooning anecdotes
about the past glories of Venice in general, and of his illustrious family
in particular. Why, in Heaven's name, must he pitch upon Zaffirino for his
mooning, this old duffer of a patrician?
"Zaffirino,--ah yes, to be sure! Balthasar Cesari, called Zaffirino,"
snuffles the voice of Count Alvise, who always repeats the last word of
every sentence at least three times. "Yes, Zaffirino, to be sure! A famous
singer of the days of my forefathers; yes, of my forefathers, dear lady!"
Then a lot of rubbish about the former greatness of Venice, the glories of
old music, the former Conservatoires, all mixed up with anecdotes of
Rossini and Donizetti, whom he pretends to have known intimately. Finally,
a story, of course containing plenty about his illustrious family:--"My
great grand-aunt, the Procuratessa Vendramin, from whom we have inherited
our estate of Mistrˆ, on the Brenta"--a hopelessly muddled story,
apparently, fully of digressions, but of which that singer Zaffirino is
the hero. The narrative, little by little, becomes more intelligible, or
perhaps it is I who am giving it more attention.
"It seems," says the Count, "that there was one of his songs in
particular which was called the 'Husbands' Air'--L'Aria dei Marit--because
they didn't enjoy it quite as much as their better-halves.... My
grand-aunt, Pisana Renier, married to the Procuratore Vendramin, was a
patrician of the old school, of the style that was getting rare a hundred
years ago. Her virtue and her pride rendered her unapproachable.
Zaffirino, on his part, was in the habit of boasting that no woman had
ever been able to resist his singing, which, it appears, had its
foundation in fact--the ideal changes, my dear lady, the ideal changes a
good deal from one century to another!--and that his first song could make
any woman turn pale and lower her eyes, the second make her madly in love,
while the third song could kill her off on the spot, kill her for love,
there under his very eyes, if he only felt inclined. My grand-aunt
Vendramin laughed when this story was told her, refused to go to hear this
insolent dog, and added that it might be quite possible by the aid of
spells and infernal pacts to kill a gentildonna, but as to making her fall
in love with a lackey--never! This answer was naturally reported to
Zaffirino, who piqued himself upon always getting the better of any one
who was wanting in deference to his voice. Like the ancient Romans,
parcere subjectis et debellare superbos. You American ladies, who are so
learned, will appreciate this little quotation from the divine Virgil.
While seeming to avoid the Procuratessa Vendramin, Zaffirino took the
opportunity, one evening at a large assembly, to sing in her presence. He
sang and sang and sang until the poor grand-aunt Pisana fell ill for love.
The most skilful physicians were kept unable to explain the mysterious
malady which was visibly killing the poor young lady; and the Procuratore
Vendramin applied in vain to the most venerated Madonnas, and vainly
promised an altar of silver, with massive gold candlesticks, to Saints
Cosmas and Damian, patrons of the art of healing. At last the
brother-in-law of the Procuratessa, Monsignor Almor˜ Vendramin, Patriarch
of Aquileia, a prelate famous for the sanctity of his life, obtained in a
vision of Saint Justina, for whom he entertained a particular devotion,
the information that the only thing which could benefit the strange
illness of his sister-in-law was the voice of Zaffirino. Take notice that
my poor grand-aunt had never condescended to such a revelation.
"The Procuratore was enchanted at this happy solution; and his lordship
the Patriarch went to seek Zaffirino in person, and carried him in his own
coach to the Villa of Mistrˆ, where the Procuratessa was residing. On
being told what was about to happen, my poor grand-aunt went into fits of
rage, which were succeeded immediately by equally violent fits of joy.
However, she never forgot what was due to her great position. Although
sick almost unto death, she had herself arrayed with the greatest pomp,
caused her face to be painted, and put on all her diamonds: it would seem
as if she were anxious to affirm her full dignity before this singer.
Accordingly she received Zaffirino reclining on a sofa which had been
placed in the great ballroom of the Villa of Mistrˆ, and beneath the
princely canopy; for the Vendramins, who had intermarried with the house
of Mantua, possessed imperial fiefs and were princes of the Holy Roman
Empire. Zaffirino saluted her with the most profound respect, but not a
word passed between them. Only, the singer inquired from the Procuratore
whether the illustrious lady had received the Sacraments of the Church.
Being told that the Procuratessa had herself asked to be given extreme
unction from the hands of her brother-in-law, he declared his readiness to
obey the orders of His Excellency, and sat down at once to the
harpsichord.
"Never had he sung so divinely. At the end of the first song the
Procuratessa Vendramin had already revived most extraordinarily; by the
end of the second she appeared entirely cured and beaming with beauty and
happiness; but at the third air--the Aria dei Mariti, no doubt--she began
to change frightfully; she gave a dreadful cry, and fell into the
convulsions of death. In a quarter of an hour she was dead! Zaffirino did
not wait to see her die. Having finished his song, he withdrew instantly,
took post-horses, and travelled day and night as far as Munich. People
remarked that he had presented himself at Mistrˆ dressed in mourning,
although he had mentioned no death among his relatives; also that he had
prepared everything for his departure, as if fearing the wrath of so
powerful a family. Then there was also the extraordinary question he had
asked before beginning to sing, about the Procuratessa having confessed
and received extreme unction.... No, thanks, my dear lady, no cigarettes
for me. But if it does not distress you or your charming daughter, may I
humbly beg permission to smoke a cigar?"
And Count Alvise, enchanted with his talent for narrative, and sure of
having secured for his son the heart and the dollars of his fair audience,
proceeds to light a candle, and at the candle one of those long black
Italian cigars which require preliminary disinfection before smoking.
... If this state of things goes on I shall just have to ask the doctor
for a bottle; this ridiculous beating of my heart and disgusting cold
perspiration have increased steadily during Count Alvise's narrative. To
keep myself in countenance among the various idiotic commentaries on this
cock-and-bull story of a vocal coxcomb and a vapouring great lady, I begin
to unroll the engraving, and to examine stupidly the portrait of
Zaffirino, once so renowned, now so forgotten. A ridiculous ass, this
singer, under his triumphal arch, with his stuffed Cupids and the great
fat winged kitchenmaid crowning him with laurels. How flat and vapid and
vulgar it is, to be sure, all this odious eighteenth century!
But he, personally, is not so utterly vapid as I had thought. That
effeminate, fat face of his is almost beautiful, with an odd smile, brazen
and cruel. I have seen faces like this, if not in real life, at least in
my boyish romantic dreams, when I read Swinburne and Baudelaire, the faces
of wicked, vindictive women. Oh yes! he is decidedly a beautiful creature,
this Zaffirino, and his voice must have had the same sort of beauty and
the same expression of wickedness...
"Come on, Magnus," sound the voices of my fellow-boarders, "be a good
fellow and sing us one of the old chap's songs; or at least something or
other of that day, and we'll make believe it was the air with which he
killed that poor lady."
"Oh yes! the Aria dei Mariti, the 'Husbands' Air,'" mumbles old Alvise,
between the puffs at his impossible black cigar. "My poor grand-aunt,
Pisana Vendramin; he went and killed her with those songs of his, with
that Aria dei Mariti."
I feel senseless rage overcoming me. Is it that horrible palpitation
(by the way, there is a Norwegian doctor, my fellow-countryman, at Venice
just now) which is sending the blood to my brain and making me mad? The
people round the piano, the furniture, everything together seems to get
mixed and to turn into moving blobs of colour. I set to singing; the only
thing which remains distinct before my eyes being the portrait of
Zaffirino, on the edge of that boarding-house piano; the sensual,
effeminate face, with its wicked, cynical smile, keeps appearing and
disappearing as the print wavers about in the draught that makes the
candles smoke and gutter. And I set to singing madly, singing I don't know
what. Yes; I begin to identify it: 'tis the Biondina in Gondoleta, the
only song of the eighteenth century which is still remembered by the
Venetian people. I sing it, mimicking every old-school grace; shakes,
cadences, languishingly swelled and diminished notes, and adding all
manner of buffooneries, until the audience, recovering from its surprise,
begins to shake with laughing; until I begin to laugh myself, madly,
frantically, between the phrases of the melody, my voice finally smothered
in this dull, brutal laughter.... And then, to crown it all, I shake my
fist at this long-dead singer, looking at me with his wicked woman's face,
with his mocking, fatuous smile.
"Ah! you would like to be revenged on me also!" I exclaim. "You would
like me to write you nice roulades and flourishes, another nice Aria dei
Mariti, my fine Zaffirino!"
That night I dreamed a very strange dream. Even in the big
half-furnished room the heat and closeness were stifling. The air seemed
laden with the scent of all manner of white flowers, faint and heavy in
their intolerable sweetness: tuberoses, gardenias, and jasmines drooping I
know not where in neglected vases. The moonlight had transformed the
marble floor around me into a shallow, shining. pool. On account of the
heat I had exchanged my bed for a big old-fashioned sofa of light wood,
painted with little nosegays and sprigs, like an old silk; and I lay
there, not attempting to sleep, and letting my thoughts go vaguely to my
opera of Ogier the Dane, of which I had long finished writing the words,
and for whose music I had hoped to find some inspiration in this strange
Venice, floating, as it were, in the stagnant lagoon of the past. But
Venice had merely put all my ideas into hopeless confusion; it was as if
there arose out of its shallow waters a miasma of long-dead melodies,
which sickened but intoxicated my soul. I lay on my sofa watching that
pool of whitish light, which rose higher and higher, little trickles of
light meeting it here and there, wherever the moon's rays struck upon some
polished surface; while huge shadows waved to and fro in the draught of
the open balcony.
I went over and over that old Norse story: how the Paladin, Ogier, one
of the knights of Charlemagne, was decoyed during his homeward wanderings
from the Holy Land by the arts of an enchantress, the same who had once
held in bondage the great Emperor C¾sar and given him King Oberon for a
son; how Ogier had tarried in that island only one day and one night, and
yet, when he came home to his kingdom, he found all changed, his friends
dead, his family dethroned, and not a man who knew his face; until at
last, driven hither and thither like a beggar, a poor minstrel had taken
compassion of his sufferings and given him all he could give--a song, the
song of the prowess of a hero dead for hundreds of years, the Paladin
Ogier the Dane.
The story of Ogier ran into a dream, as vivid as my waking thoughts had
been vague. I was looking no longer at the pool of moonlight spreading
round my couch, with its trickles of light and looming, waving shadows,
but the frescoed walls of a great saloon. It was not, as I recognised in a
second, the dining-room of that Venetian palace now turned into a
boarding-house. It was a far larger room, a real ballroom, almost circular
in its octagon shape, with eight huge white doors surrounded by stucco
mouldings, and, high on the vault of the ceiling, eight little galleries
or recesses like boxes at a theatre, intended no doubt for musicians and
spectators. The place was im- perfectly lighted by only one of the eight
chandeliers, which revolved slowly, like huge spiders, each on its long
cord. But the light struck upon the gilt stuccoes opposite me, and on a
large expanse of fresco, the sacrifice of Iphigenia, with Agamemnon and
Achilles in Roman helmets, lappets, and knee-breeches. It discovered also
one of the oil panels let into the mouldings of the roof, a goddess in
lemon and lilac draperies, foreshortened over a great green peacock. Round
the room, where the light reached, I could make out big yellow satin sofas
and heavy gilded consoles; in the shadow of a corner was what looked like
a piano, and farther in the shade one of those big canopies which decorate
the anterooms of Roman palaces. I looked about me, wondering where I was:
a heavy, sweet smell, reminding me of the flavour of a peach, filled the
place.
Little by little I began to perceive sounds; little, sharp, metallic,
detached notes, like those of a mandoline; and there was united to them a
voice, very low and sweet, almost a whisper, which grew and grew and grew,
until the whole place was filled with that exquisite vibrating note, of a
strange, exotic, unique quality. The note went on, swelling and swelling.
Suddenly there was a horrible piercing shriek, and the thud of a body on
the floor, and all manner of smothered exclamations. There, close by the
canopy, a light suddenly appeared; and I could see, among the dark figures
moving to and fro in the room, a woman lying on the ground, surrounded by
other women. Her blond hair, tangled, full of diamond-sparkles which cut
through the half-darkness, was hanging dishevelled; the laces of her
bodice had been cut, and her white breast shone among the sheen of
jewelled brocade; her face was bent forwards, and a thin white arm
trailed, like a broken limb, across the knees of one of the women who were
endeavouring to lift her. There was a sudden splash of water against the
floor, more confused exclamations, a hoarse, broken moan, and a gurgling,
dreadful sound.... I awoke with a start and rushed to the window.
Outside, in the blue haze of the moon, the church and belfry of St.
George loomed blue and hazy, with the black hull and rigging, the red
lights, of a large steamer moored before them. From the lagoon rose a damp
sea-breeze. What was it all? Ah! I began to understand: that story of old
Count Alvise's, the death of his grand-aunt, Pisana Vendramin. Yes, it was
about that I had been dreaming.
I returned to my room; I struck a light, and sat down to my
writing-table. Sleep had become impossible. I tried to work at my opera.
Once or twice I thought I had got hold of what I had looked for so
long.... But as soon as I tried to lay hold of my theme, there arose in my
mind the distant echo of that voice, of that long note swelled slowly by
insensible degrees, that long note whose tone was so strong and so subtle.
There are in the life of an artist moments when, still unable to seize
his own inspiration, or even clearly to discern it, he becomes aware of
the approach of that long-invoked idea. A mingled joy and terror warn him
that before another day, another hour have passed, the inspiration shall
have crossed the threshold of his soul and flooded it with its rapture.
All day I had felt the need of isolation and quiet, and at nightfall I
went for. a row on the most solitary part of the lagoon. All things seemed
to tell that I was going to meet my inspiration, and I awaited its coming
as a lover awaits his beloved.
I had stopped my gondola for a moment, and as I gently swayed to and
fro on the water, all paved with moonbeams, it seemed to me that I was on
the confines of an imaginary world. It lay close at hand, enveloped in
luminous, pale blue mist, through which the moon had cut a wide and
glistening path; out to sea, the little islands, like moored black boats,
only accentuated the solitude of this region of moonbeams and wavelets;
while the hum of the insects in orchards hard by merely added to the
impression of untroubled silence. On some such seas, I thought, must the
Paladin Ogier, have sailed when about to discover that during that sleep
at the enchantress's knees centuries had elapsed and the heroic world had
set, and the kingdom of prose had come.
While my gondola rocked stationary on that sea of moonbeams, I pondered
over that twilight of the heroic world. In the soft rattle of the water on
the hull I seemed to hear the rattle of all that armour, of all those
swords swinging rusty on the walls, neglected by the degenerate sons of
the great champions of old. I had long been in search of a theme which I
called the theme of the "Prowess of Ogier;" it was to appear from time to
time in the course of my opera, to develop at last into that song of the
Minstrel, which reveals to the hero that he is one of a long-dead world.
And at this moment I seemed to feel the presence of that theme. Yet an
instant, and my mind would be overwhelmed by that savage music, heroic,
funereal.
Suddenly there came across the lagoon, cleaving, chequering, and
fretting the silence with a lacework of sound even as the moon was
fretting and cleaving the water, a ripple of music, a voice breaking
itself in a shower of little scales and cadences and trills.
I sank back upon my cushions. The vision of heroic days had vanished,
and before my closed eyes there seemed to dance multitudes of little stars
of light, chasing ard interlacing like those sudden vocalisations.
"To shore! Quick!" I cried to the gondolier.
But the sounds had ceased; and there came from the orchards, with their
mulberry-trees glistening in the moonlight, and their black swaying
cypress-plumes, nothing save the confused hum, the monotonous chirp, of
the crickets.
I looked around me: on one side empty dunes, orchards, and meadows,
without house or steeple; on the other, the blue and misty sea, empty to
where distant islets were profiled black on the horizon.
A faintness overcame me, and I felt myself dissolve. For all of a
sudden a second ripple of voice swept over the lagoon, a shower of little
notes, which seemed to form a little mocking laugh.
Then again all was still. This silence lasted so long that I fell once
more to meditating on my opera. I lay in wait once more for the
half-caught theme. But no. It was not that theme for which I was waiting
and watching with baited breath. I realised my delusion when, on rounding
the point of the Giudecca, the murmur of a voice arose from the midst of
the waters, a thread of sound slender as a moonbeam, scarce audible, but
exquisite, which expanded slowly, insensibly, taking volume and body,
taking flesh almost and fire, an ineffable quality, full, passionate, but
veiled, as it were, in a subtle, downy wrapper. The note grew stronger and
stronger, and warmer and more passionate, until it burst through that
strange and charming veil, and emerged beaming, to break itself in the
luminous facets of a wonderful shake, long, superb, triumphant.
There was a dead silence.
"Row to St. Mark's!" I exclaimed. "Quick!"
The gondola glided through the long, glittering track of moonbeams, and
rent the great band of yellow, reflected light, mirroring the cupolas of
St. Mark's, the lace-like pinnacles of the palace, and the slender pink
belfry, which rose from the lit-up water to the pale and bluish evening
sky.
In the larger of the two squares the military band was blaring through
the last spirals of a crescendo of Rossini. The crowd was dispersing in
this great open-air ballroom, and the sounds arose which invariably follow
upon out-of-door music. A clatter of spoons and glasses, a rustle and
grating of frocks and of chairs, and the click of scabbards on the
pavement. I pushed my way among the fashionable youths contemplating the
ladies while sucking the knob of their sticks; through the serried ranks
of respectable families, marching arm in arm with their white frocked
young ladies close in front. I took a seat before Florian's, among the
customers stretching themselves before departing, and the waiters hurrying
to and fro, clattering their empty cups and trays. Two imitation
Neapolitans were slipping their guitar and violin under their arm, ready
to leave the place.
"Stop!" I cried to them; "don't go yet. Sing me something--sing La
Camesella or Funicul", funiculˆ--no matter what, provided you make a row;"
and as they screamed and scraped their utmost, I added, "But can't you
sing louder, d--n you!--sing louder, do you understand?"
I felt the need of noise, of yells and false notes, of something vulgar
and hideous to drive away that ghost-voice which was haunting me.
Again and again I told myself that it had been some silly prank of a
romantic amateur, hidden in the gardens of the shore or gliding
unperceived on the lagoon; and that the sorcery of moonlight and sea-mist
had transfigured for my excited brain mere humdrum roulades out of
exercises of Bordogni or Crescentini.
But all the same I continued to be haunted by that voice. My work was
interrupted ever and anon by the attempt to catch its imaginary echo; and
the heroic harmonies of my Scandinavian legend were strangely interwoven
with voluptuous phrases and florid cadences in which I seemed to hear
again that same accursed voice.
To be haunted by singing-exercises! It seemed too ridiculous for a man
who professedly despised the art of singing. And still, I preferred to
believe in that childish amateur, amusing himself with warbling to the
moon.
One day, while making these reflections the hundredth time over, my
eyes chanced to light upon the portrait of Zaffirino, which my friend had
pinned against the wall. I pulled it down and tore it into half a dozen
shreds. Then, already ashamed of my folly, I watched the torn pieces float
down from the window, wafted hither and thither by the sea-breeze. One
scrap got caught in a yellow blind below me; the others fell into the
canal, and were speedily lost to sight in the dark water. I was overcome
with shame. My heart beat like bursting. What a miserable, unnerved worm I
had become in this cursed Venice, with its languishing moonlights, its
atmosphere as of some stuffy boudoir, long unused, full of old stuffs and
pot-pourri!
That night, however, things seemed to be going better. I was able to
settle down to my opera, and even to work at it. In the intervals my
thoughts returned, not without a certain pleasure, to those scattered
fragments of the torn engraving fluttering down to the water. I was
disturbed at my piano by the hoarse voices and the scraping of violins
which rose from one of those music-boats that station at night under the
hotels of the Grand Canal. The moon had set. Under my balcony the water
stretched black into the distance, its darkness cut by the still darker
outlines of the flotilla of gondolas in attendance on the music-boat,
where the faces of the singers, and the guitars and violins, gleamed
reddish under the unsteady light of the Chinese-lanterns.
"Jammo, jammo; jammo, jammo jˆ," sang the loud, hoarse voices; then a
tremendous scrape and twang, and the yelled-out burden, "Funicul",
funiculˆ; funicul", funiculˆ; jammo, jammo, jammo, jammo, jammo jˆ."
Then came a few cries of "Bis, Bis!" from a neighbouring hotel, a brief
clapping of hands, the sound of a handful of coppers rattling into the
boat, and the oar-stroke of some gondolier making ready to turn away.
"Sing the Camesella," ordered some voice with a foreign accent.
"No, no! Santa Lucia."
"I want the Camesella."
"No! Santa Lucia. Hi! sing Santa Lucia--d'you hear?"
The musicians, under their green and yellow and red lamps, held a
whispered consultation on the manner of conciliating these contradictory
demands. Then, after a minute's hesitation, the violins began the prelude
of that once famous air, which has remained popular in Venice--the words
written, some hundred years ago, by the patrician Gritti, the music by an
unknown composer--La Biondina in Gondoleta.
That cursed eighteenth century! It seemed a malignant fatality that
made these brutes choose just this piece to interrupt me.
At last the long prelude came to an end; and above the cracked guitars
and squeaking fiddles there arose, not the expected nasal chorus, but a
single voice singing below its breath.
My arteries throbbed. How well I knew that voice! It was singing, as I
have said, below its breath, yet none the less it sufficed to fill all
that reach of the canal with its strange quality of tone, exquisite,
far-fetched.
They were long-drawn-out notes, of intense but peculiar sweetness, a
man's voice which had much of a woman's, but more even of a chorister's,
but a chorister's voice without its limpidity and innocence; its
youthfulness was veiled, muffled, as it were, in a sort of downy
vagueness, as if a passion of tears withheld.
There was a burst of applause, and the old palaces re-echoed with the
clapping. "Bravo, bravo! Thank you, thank you! Sing again--please, sing
again. Who can it be?"
And then a bumping of hulls, a splashing of oars, and the oaths of
gondoliers trying to push each other away, as the red prow-lamps of the
gondolas pressed round the gaily lit singing-boat.
But no one stirred on board. It was to none of them that this applause
was due. And while every one pressed on, and clapped and vociferated, one
little red prow-lamp dropped away from the fleet; for a moment a single
gondola stood forth black upon the black water, and then was lost in the
night.
For several days the mysterious singer was the universal topic. The
people of the music-boat swore that no one besides themselves had been on
board, and that they knew as little as ourselves about the owner of that
voice. The gondoliers, despite their descent from the spies of the old
Republic, were equally unable to furnish any clue. No musical celebrity
was known or suspected to be at Venice; and every one agreed that such a
singer must be a European celebrity. The strangest thing in this strange
business was, that even among those learned in music there was no
agreement on the subject of this voice: it was called by all sorts of
names and described by all manner of incongruous adjectives; people went
so far as to dispute whether the voice belonged to a man or to a woman:
every one had some new definition.
In all these musical discussions I, alone, brought forward no opinion.
I felt a repugnance, an impossibility almost, of speaking about that
voice; and the more or less commonplace conjectures of my friend had the
invariable effect of sending me out of the room.
Meanwhile my work was becoming daily more difficult, and I soon passed
from utter impotence to a state of inexplicable agitation. Every morning I
arose with fine resolutions and grand projects of work; only to go to bed
that night without having accomplished anything. I spent hours leaning on
my balcony, or wandering through the network of lanes with their ribbon of
blue sky, endeavouring vainly to expel the thought of that voice, or
endeavouring in reality to reproduce it in my memory; for the more I tried
to banish it from my thoughts, the more I grew to thirst for that
extraordinary tone, for those mysteriously downy, veiled notes; and no
sooner did I make an effort to work at my opera than my head was full of
scraps of forgotten eighteenth century airs, of frivolous or languishing
little phrases; and I fell to wondering with a bitter-sweet longing how
those songs would have sounded if sung by that voice.
At length it became necessary to see a doctor, from whom, however, I
carefully hid away all the stranger symptoms of my malady. The air of the
lagoons, the great heat, he answered cheerfully, had pulled me down a
little; a tonic and a month in the country, with plenty of riding and no
work, would make me myself again. That old idler, Count Alvise, who had
insisted on accompanying me to the physician's, immediately suggested that
I should go and stay with his son, who was boring himself to death
superintending the maize harvest on the mainland: he could promise me
excellent air, plenty of horses, and all the peaceful surroundings and the
delightful occupations of a rural life--"Be sensible, my dear Magnus, and
just go quietly to Mistrˆ."
Mistrˆ--the name sent a shiver all down me. I was about to decline the
invitation, when a thought suddenly loomed vaguely in my mind.
"Yes, dear Count," I answered; "I accept your invitation with gratitude
and pleasure. I will start to-morrow for Mistrˆ."
The next day found me at Padua, on my way to the Villa of Mistrˆ. It
seemed as if I had left an intolerable burden behind me. I was, for the
first time since how long, quite light of heart. The tortuous, rough-paved
streets, with their empty, gloomy porticoes; the ill-plastered palaces,
with closed, discoloured shutters; the little rambling square, with meagre
trees and stubborn grass; the Venetian garden-houses reflecting their
crumbling graces in the muddy canal; the gardens without gates and the
gates without gardens, the avenues leading nowhere; and the population of
blind and legless beggars, of whining sacristans, which issued as by magic
from between the flag-stones and dust-heaps and weeds under the fierce
August sun, all this dreariness merely amused and pleased me. My good
spirits were heightened by a musical mass which I had the good fortune to
hear at St. Anthony's.
Never in all my days had I heard anything comparable, although Italy
affords many strange things in the way of sacred music. Into the deep
nasal chanting of the priests there had suddenly burst a chorus of
children, singing absolutely inde- pendent of all time and tune; grunting
of priests answered by squealing of boys, slow Gregorian modulation
interrupted by jaunty barrel-organ pipings, an insane, insanely merry
jumble of bellowing and barking, mewing and cackling and braying, such as
would have enlivened a witches' meeting, or rather some medi¾val Feast of
Fools. And, to make the grotesqueness of such music still more fantastic
and Hoffmannlike, there was, besides, the magnificence of the piles of
sculptured marbles and gilded bronzes, the tradition of the musical
splendour for which St. Anthony's had been famous in days gone by. I had
read in old travellers, Lalande and Burney, that the Republic of St. Mark
had squandered immense sums not merely on the monuments and decoration,
but on the musical establishment of its great cathedral of Terra Firma. In
the midst of this ineffable concert of impossible voices and instruments,
I tried to imagine the voice of Guadagni, the soprano for whom Gluck had
written Che far˜ senza Euridice, and the fiddle of Tartini, that Tartini
with whom the devil had once come and made music. And the delight in
anything so absolutely, barbarously, grotesquely, fantastically
incongruous as such a performance in such a place was heightened by a
sense of profanation: such were the successors of those wonderful
musicians of that hated eighteenth century!
The whole thing had delighted me so much, so very much more than the
most faultless performance could have done, that I determined to enjoy it
once more; and towards vesper-time, after a cheerful dinner with two
bagmen at the inn of the Golden Star, and a pipe over the rough sketch of
a possible cantata upon the music which the devil made for Tartini, I
turned my steps once more towards St. Anthony's.
The bells were ringing for sunset, and a muffled sound of organs seemed
to issue from the huge, solitary church; I pushed my way under the heavy
leathern curtain, expecting to be greeted by the grotesque performance of
that morning.
I proved mistaken. Vespers must long have been over. A smell of stale
incense, a crypt-like damp filled my mouth; it was already night in that
vast cathedral. Out of the darkness glimmered the votive-lamps of the
chapels, throwing wavering lights upon the red polished marble, the gilded
railing, and chandeliers, and plaqueing with yellow the muscles of some
sculptured figure. In a corner a burning taper put a halo about the head
of a priest, burnishing his shining bald skull, his white surplice, and
the open book before him. "Amen" he chanted; the book was closed with a
snap, the light moved up the apse, some dark figures of women rose from
their knees and passed quickly towards the door; a man saying his prayers
before a chapel also got up, making a great clatter in dropping his stick.
The church was empty, and I expected every minute to be turned out by
the sacristan making his evening round to close the doors. I was leaning
against a pillar, looking into the greyness of the great arches, when the
organ suddenly burst out into a series of chords, rolling through the
echoes of the church: it seemed to be the conclusion of some service. And
above the organ rose the notes of a voice; high, soft, enveloped in a kind
of downiness, like a cloud of incense, and which ran through the mazes of
a long cadence. The voice dropped into silence; with two thundering chords
the organ closed in. All was silent. For a moment I stood leaning against
one of the pillars of the nave: my hair was clammy, my knees sank beneath
me, an enervating heat spread through my body; I tried to breathe more
largely, to suck in the sounds with the incense-laden air. I was supremely
happy, and yet as if I were dying; then suddenly a chill ran through me,
and with it a vague panic. I turned away and hurried out into the open.
The evening sky lay pure and blue along the jagged line of roofs; the
bats and swallows were wheeling about; and from the belfries all around,
half-drowned by the deep bell of St. Anthony's, jangled the peel of the
Ave Maria.
"You really don't seem well," young Count Alvise had said the previous
evening, as he wel- comed me, in the light of a lantern held up by a
peasant, in the weedy back-garden of the Villa of Mistrˆ. Everything had
seemed to me like a dream: the jingle of the horse's bells driving in the
dark from Padua, as the lantern swept the acacia-hedges with their wide
yellow light; the grating of the wheels on the gravel; the supper-table,
illumined by a single petroleum lamp for fear of attracting mosquitoes,
where a broken old lackey, in an old stable jacket, handed round the
dishes among the fumes of onion; Alvise's fat mother gabbling dialect in a
shrill, benevolent voice behind the bullfights on her fan; the unshaven
village priest, perpetually fidgeting with his glass and foot, and
sticking one shoulder up above the other. And now, in the afternoon, I
felt as if I had been in this long, rambling, tumble-down Villa of
Mistrˆ--a villa three-quarters of which was given up to the storage of
grain and garden tools, or to the exercise of rats, mice, scorpions, and
centipedes--all my life; as if I had always sat there, in Count Alvise's
study, among the pile of undusted books on agriculture, the sheaves of
accounts, the samples of grain and silkworm seed, the ink-stains and the
cigar-ends; as if I had never heard of anything save the cereal basis of
Italian agriculture, the diseases of maize, the peronospora of the vine,
the breeds of bullocks, and the iniquities of farm labourers; with the
blue cones of the Euganean hills closing in the green shimmer of plain
outside the window.
After an early dinner, again with the screaming gabble of the fat old
Countess, the fidgeting and shoulder-raising of the unshaven priest, the
smell of fried oil and stewed onions, Count Alvise made me get into the
cart beside him, and whirled me along among clouds of dust, between the
endless glister of poplars, acacias, and maples, to one of his farms.
In the burning sun some twenty or thirty girls, in coloured skirts,
laced bodices, and big straw-hats, were threshing the maize on the big red
brick threshing-floor, while others were winnowing the grain in great
sieves. Young Alvise III. (the old one was Alvise II.: every one is
Alvise, that is to say, Lewis, in that family; the name is on the house,
the carts, the barrows, the very pails) picked up the maize, touched it,
tasted it, said something to the girls that made them laugh, and something
to the head farmer that made him look very glum; and then led me into a
huge stable, where some twenty or thirty white bullocks were stamping,
switching their tails, hitting their horns against the mangers in the
dark. Alvise III. patted each, called him by his name, gave him some salt
or a turnip, and explained which was the Mantuan breed, which the Apulian,
which the Romagnolo, and so on. Then he bade me jump into the trap, and
off we went again through the dust, among the hedges and ditches, till we
came to some more brick farm buildings with pinkish roofs smoking against
the blue sky. Here there were more young women threshing and winnowing the
maize, which made a great golden Dana' cloud; more bullocks stamping and
lowing in the cool darkness; more joking, fault-finding, explaining; and
thus through five farms, until I seemed to see the rhythmical rising and
falling of the flails against the hot sky, the shower of golden grains,
the yellow dust from the winnowing-sieves on to the bricks, the switching
of innumerable tails and plunging of innumerable horns, the glistening of
huge white flanks and foreheads, whenever I closed my eyes.
"A good day's work!" cried Count Alvise, stretching out his long legs
with the tight trousers riding up over the Wellington boots. "Mamma, give
us some aniseed-syrup after dinner; it is an excellent restorative and
precaution against the fevers of this country."
"Oh! you've got fever in this part of the world, have you? Why, your
father said the air was so good!"
"Nothing, nothing," soothed the old Countess. "The only thing to be
dreaded are mosquitoes; take care to fasten your shutters before lighting
the candle."
"Well," rejoined young Alvise, with an effort of conscience, "of course
there are fevers. But they needn't hurt you. Only, don' go out into the
garden at night, if you don't want to catch them. Papa told me that you
have fancies for moonlight rambles. It won't do in this climate, my dear
fellow; it won't do. If you must stalk about at night, being a genius,
take a turn inside the house; you can get quite exercise enough."
After dinner the aniseed-syrup was produced, together with brandy and
cigars, and they all sat in the long, narrow, half-furnished room on the
first floor; the old Countess knitting a garment of uncertain shape and
destination, the priest reading out the newspaper; Count Alvise puffing at
his long, crooked cigar, and pulling the ears of a long, lean dog with a
suspicion of mange and a stiff eye. From the dark garden outside rose the
hum and whirr of countless insects, and the smell of the grapes which hung
black against the starlit, blue sky, on the trellis. I went to the
balcony. The garden lay dark beneath; against the twinkling horizon stood
out the tall poplars. There was the sharp cry of an owl; the barking of a
dog; a sudden whiff of warm, enervating perfume, a perfume that made me
think of the taste of certain peaches, and suggested white, thick,
wax-like petals. I seemed to have smelt that flower once before: it made
me feel languid, almost faint.
"I am very tired," I said to Count Alvise. "See how feeble we city folk
become!"
But, despite my fatigue, I found it quite impossible to sleep. The
night seemed perfectly stifling. I had felt nothing like it at Venice.
Despite the injunctions of the Countess I opened the solid wooden
shutters, hermetically closed against mosquitoes, and looked out.
The moon had risen; and beneath it lay the big lawns, the rounded
tree-tops, bathed in a blue, luminous mist, every leaf glistening and
trembling in what seemed a heaving sea of light. Beneath the window was
the long trellis, with the white shining piece of pavement under it. It
was so bright that I could distinguish the green of the vine-leaves, the
dull red of the catalpa-flowers. There was in the air a vague scent of cut
grass, of ripe American grapes, of that white flower (it must be white)
which made me think of the taste of peaches all melting into the delicious
freshness of falling dew. From the village church came the stroke of one:
Heaven knows how long I had been vainly attempting to sleep. A shiver ran
through me, and my head suddenly filled as with the fumes of some subtle
wine; I remembered all those weedy embankments, those canals full of
stagnant water, the yellow faces of the peasants; the word malaria
returned to my mind. No matter! I remained leaning on the window, with a
thirsty longing to plunge myself into this blue moon-mist, this dew and
perfume and silence, which seemed to vibrate and quiver like the stars
that strewed the depths of heaven.... What music, even Wagner's, or of
that great singer of starry nights, the divine Schumann, what music could
ever compare with this great silence, with this great concert of voiceless
things that sing within one's soul?
As I made this reflection, a note, high, vibrating, and sweet, rent the
silence, which immediately closed around it. I leaned out of the window,
my heart beating as though it must burst. After a brief space the silence
was cloven once more by that note, as the darkness is cloven by a falling
star or a firefly rising slowly like a rocket. But this time it was plain
that the voice did not come, as I had imagined, from the garden, but from
the house itself, from some corner of this rambling old villa of Mistrˆ.
Mistrˆ--Mistrˆ! The name rang in my ears, and I began at length to
grasp its significance, which seems to have escaped me till then. "Yes," I
said to myself, "it is quite natural." And with this odd impression of
naturalness was mixed a feverish, impatient pleasure. It was as if I had
come to Mistrˆ on purpose, and that I was about to meet the object of my
long and weary hopes.
Grasping the lamp with its singed green shade, I gently opened the door
and made my way through a series of long passages and of big, empty rooms,
in which my steps re-echoed as in a church, and my light disturbed whole
swarms of bats. I wandered at random, farther and farther from the
inhabited part of the buildings.
This silence made me feel sick; I gasped as under a sudden
disappointment.
All of a sudden there came a sound--chords, metallic, sharp, rather
like the tone of a mandoline--close to my ear. Yes, quite close: I was
separated from the sounds only by a partition. I fumbled for a door; the
unsteady light of my lamp was insufficient for my eyes, which were
swimming like those of a drunkard. At last I found a latch, and, after a
moment's hesitation, I lifted it and gently pushed open the door. At first
I could not understand what manner of place I was in. It was dark all
round me, but a brilliant light blinded me, a light coming from below and
striking the opposite wall. It was as if I had entered a dark box in a
half-lighted theatre. I was, in fact, in something of the kind, a sort of
dark hole with a high balustrade, half-hidden by an up-drawn curtain. I
remembered those little galleries or recesses for the use of musicians or
lookers-on--which exist under the ceiling of the ballrooms in certain old
Italian palaces. Yes; it must have been one like that. Opposite me was a
vaulted ceiling covered with gilt mouldings, which framed great
time-blackened canvases; and lower down, in the light thrown up from
below, stretched a wall covered with faded frescoes. Where had I seen that
goddess in lilac and lemon draperies foreshortened over a big, green
peacock? For she was familiar to me, and the stucco Tritons also who
twisted their tails round her gilded frame. And that fresco, with warriors
in Roman cuirasses and green and blue lappets, and knee-breeches--where
could I have seen them before? I asked myself these questions without
experiencing any surprise. Moreover, I was very calm, as one is calm
sometimes in extraordinary dreams--could I be dreaming?
I advanced gently and leaned over the balustrade. My eyes were met at
first by the darkness above me, where, like gigantic spiders, the big
chandeliers rotated slowly, hanging from the ceiling. Only one of them was
lit, and its Murano-glass pendants, its carnations and roses, shone
opalescent in the light of the guttering wax. This chandelier lighted up
the opposite wall and that piece of ceiling with the goddess and the green
peacock; it illumined, but far less well, a corner of the huge room,
where, in the shadow of a kind of canopy, a little group of people were
crowding round a yellow satin sofa, of the same kind as those that lined
the walls. On the sofa, half-screened from me by the surrounding persons,
a woman was stretched out: the silver of her embroidered dress and the
rays of her diamonds gleamed and shot forth as she moved uneasily. And
immediately under the chandelier, in the full light, a man stooped over a
harpsichord, his head bent slightly, as if collecting his thoughts before
singing.
He struck a few chords and sang. Yes, sure enough, it was the voice,
the voice that had so long been persecuting me! I recognised at once that
delicate, voluptuous quality, strange, exquisite, sweet beyond words, but
lacking all youth and clearness. That passion veiled in tears which had
troubled my brain that night on the lagoon, and again on the Grand Canal
singing the Biondina, and yet again, only two days since, in the deserted
cathedral of Padua. But I recognised now what seemed to have been hidden
from me till then, that this voice was what I cared most for in all the
wide world.
The voice wound and unwound itself in long, languishing phrases, in
rich, voluptuous rifiorituras, all fretted with tiny scales and exquisite,
crisp shakes; it stopped ever and anon, swaying as if panting in languid
delight. And I felt my body melt even as wax in the sunshine, and it
seemed to me that I too was turning fluid and vaporous, in order to mingle
with these sounds as the moonbeams mingle with the dew.
Suddenly, from the dimly lighted corner by the canopy, came a little
piteous wail; then another followed, and was lost in the singer's voice.
During a long phrase on the harpsichord, sharp and tinkling, the singer
turned his head towards the dais, and there came a plaintive little sob.
But he, instead of stopping, struck a sharp chord; and with a thread of
voice so hushed as to be scarcely audible, slid softly into a long
cadenza. At the same moment he threw his head backwards, and the light
fell full upon the handsome, effeminate face, with its ashy pallor and
big, black brows, of the singer Zaffirino. At the sight of that face,
sensual and sullen, of that smile which was cruel and mocking like a bad
woman's, I understood--I knew not why, by what process--that his singing
must be cut short, that the accursed phrase must never be finished. I
understood that I was before an assassin, that he was killing this woman,
and killing me also, with his wicked voice.
I rushed down the narrow stair which led down from the box, pursued, as
it were, by that exquisite voice, swelling, swelling by insensible
degrees. I flung myself on the door which must be that of the big saloon.
I could see its light between the panels. I bruised my hands in trying to
wrench the latch. The door was fastened tight, and while I was struggling
with that locked door I heard the voice swelling, swelling, rending
asunder that downy veil which wrapped it, leaping forth clear,
resplendent, like the sharp and glittering blade of a knife that seemed to
enter deep into my breast. Then, once more, a wail, a death-groan, and
that dreadful noise, that hideous gurgle of breath strangled by a rush of
blood. And then a long shake, acute, brilliant, triumphant.
The door gave way beneath my weight, one half crashed in. I entered. I
was blinded by a flood of blue moonlight. It poured in through four great
windows, peaceful and diaphanous, a pale blue mist of moonlight, and
turned the huge room into a kind of submarine cave, paved with moonbeams,
full of shimmers, of pools of moonlight. It was as bright as at midday,
but the brightness was cold, blue, vaporous, supernatural. The room was
completely empty, like a great hay-loft. Only, there hung from the ceiling
the ropes which had once supported a chandelier; and in a corner, among
stacks of wood and heaps of Indian-corn, whence spread a sickly smell of
damp and mildew, there stood a long, thin harpsichord, with spindle-legs,
and its cover cracked from end to end.
I felt, all of a sudden, very calm. The one thing that mattered was the
phrase that kept moving in my head, the phrase of that unfinished cadence
which I had heard but an instant before. I opened the harpsichord, and my
fingers came down boldly upon its keys. A jingle-jangle of broken strings,
laughable and dreadful, was the only answer.
Then an extraordinary fear overtook me. I clambered out of one of the
windows; I rushed up the garden and wandered through the fields, among the
canals and the embankments, until the moon had set and the dawn began to
shiver, followed, pursued for ever by that jangle of broken strings.
People expressed much satisfaction at my recovery. It seems that one
dies of those fevers.
Recovery? But have I recovered? I walk, and eat and drink and talk; I
can even sleep. I live the life of other living creatures. But I am wasted
by a strange and deadly disease. I can never lay hold of my own
inspiration. My head is filled with music which is certainly by me, since
I have never heard it before, but which still is not my own, which I
despise and abhor: little, tripping flourishes and languishing phrases,
and long-drawn, echoing cadences.
O wicked, wicked voice, violin of flesh and blood made by the Evil
One's hand, may I not even execrate thee in peace; but is it necessary
that, at the moment when I curse, the longing to hear thee again should
parch my soul like hell-thirst? And since I have satiated thy lust for
revenge, since thou hast withered my life and withered my genius, is it
not time for pity? May I not hear one note, only one note of thine, O
singer, O wicked and contemptible wretch? |